Ok, me and my husband met 15 years ago. I was 19 and he was 23. We were both firm believers in God and after 6 months of dating, he proposed to me and we got married. We have 3 beautiful kids.
Last week he said that he lost faith in God and he said all religion is ridiculous and it doesn't help or do good…
You’re overreacting. There’s nothing wrong with masturbation (the sin of Onan was disobedience and refusing to give his sister-in-law a child, not “spilling his seed”), and your husband isn’t a “bad influence” or “dragging your children down” anywhere. If your children’s faith isn’t strong enough to withstand a little questioning, that’s not your husband’s fault.
There are a couple of scriptural passages that may be of use to you:
1 Corinthians 7:14 For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband.
Acts 16:31 Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ, and thou shalt be saved, and thy house.
Respect your husband and his beliefs if you expect him to do the same to you.
I thought in your faith woman are supposed to subservient and do as her husband ask’s of her and respect him. Well that’s what it say’s in your bible, you can’t just pick and choose!!
There is nothing wrong with masturbation, it is natural and why you would suppress your 13 year old of natural male instincts is breeding someone to have problems in adulthood. Did you have sex before marriage, bet you did and your husband??
You take your children away they will likely loose their faith more as it tore their family apart and they will hate you for it. Your husband has seen the light and at least one member of the family has insight and your children won’t be that damaged by ridiculous writings of a suppressive, confusing, hypercritical and evil faith that goes against everything that is natural!!
Your husband has rights you can not stop him seeing them or having influence, I am sure if you bring up this rant in court they will laugh you out of it and it may be your undoing and give him full access!!
Your husband is not dangerous and no court or lawyer on the land will think otherwise either!! You can not do anything but separate if you feel unhappy!!
Your Husbands right about Masturbation. He would have said the same thing even if he WAS a Christian.
You can do absolutely NOTHING about your husband being Atheist.
you shouldn’t divorce him if you truly love him.
All of the Christians on here saying things like “don’t get unequally yolked”
Guess what your Abrahamic God hates?
They’re HIS kid’s too. I don’t know what makes you people think you can just kidnap BOTH of your kids.
Let your kids choose whether or not they want to be Christian. you can’t force anyone into thinking anyway or that would just be brainwash.
You can be an Atheist and still be a great example for your kids. I know Christians that are terrible examples.
Stop being so narrow minded.
Will I see you on the news because God told you to do …? Why can’t your husband not believe in god and express that to his children, along the way explaining a natural occurrence in our society, masturbation to his son. Those ARE also his kids I presume. So why must your way be the only way.
Think of everything that kept you together for 15 years, then think of how ridiculous leaving your husband BECAUSE he is now an atheist sounds. Also, you are judging him because he doesn’t share your beliefs.
Don’t be the average christian.
Even John the Baptist got discouraged for a minute, remember? (“Aren’t Thou He that should come, or look we for another?) If your husband’s Christianity was temporary, his atheism may be too.
Your children are at the observing and decision making times of their lives. Point that out to them every day as things unfold, and walk them through it. Say, “These are the choices. Here are some of the reasons behind them. Now watch carefully for the consequences!” If you separate from your husband now you’ll force the children to face alone all those confusing things that you feel you can not tolerate. Now that your husband has “drawn a line in the sand” you need to make sure your Christianity is high contrast and lots of fun.
I think that before you consult the immature trolls of the Religion and Spirituality section, you should go to a marriage counsellor. Either that, or a psychiatrist. I’m not being condescending, but really, we’re not the best source of advice here, you need to get PROFESSIONAL counselling to work out your issues with your husband, not the half-arsed crap we may give you.
I mean, myself, see no ethical evil with masturbation, and I think you’re naïve to call it adultery because the two are not mutually inclusive by definition, and there is no conclusive evidence to suggest that masturbation has any adverse effects on a marriage, many wives are perfectly okay with their husbands masturbating to porn, because men CAN be in love and watch porn. But I’m one guy on the internet, and I’m not someone who can give you life-changing advice to work out your marriage.
So do consult a professional, but there’s one parting word I’d like to leave you with:
Don’t let religion drive a big hole between you and your husband. Love is too important to be spoiled by petty ideological differences, and if you really love your husband and are a mature person, you’re sure to be able to work it out and not let the two of you fight.
Your husband may be right by not injecting so much guilt in the mind but some how he should also say that there is danger in indulging the self too much where it may cause to destroy the health mentally and physically.
Morality is not exactly the order of religion/s, it should be natural for people with decency and dignity regardless of faith. Let your husband be what he believes or not but tell him to apply also what humans regards as the golden rule of life.
If YOU were into Scripture, you would know what God says in a case like this.
LIVE with your husband, YOU worry about your own walk with God.
1Cr 7:13 And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce him.
1Cr 7:16 How do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or, how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife?
1Cr 7:17 Nevertheless, each one should retain the place in life that the Lord assigned to him and to which God has called him. This is the rule I lay down in all the churches.
This is the time MORE THAN EVER, to just be the BEST wife you can be, and Trust God. We have to let God deal with people’s minds and hearts.
You can talk to your kids, put in your two cents, but never criticize your husband to your children.
It is all in God’s hands.
You should realise that there is also no such thing as God and become an atheist too because about the souls/god/heaven/hell thing, there isn’t really any prove for them.
About the part of teaching morals, you and your husband should talk about what are the right morals to instill in your kids. Don’t listen to the bible too, because the bible isn’t the perfect moral code for living decent lives. (it advocates slavery among many other immoral stuff)
We believe that marriage is a contract and that it should only be broken because of immorality. I feel for your situation. My question to you is, how strong is your belief? Do you trust in God?
You have said that you love your husband. If he were strung out on drugs would you still love him? If he were a porn addict or addicted to gambling would you still love him? What I am asking is, do you believe that he is still a child of God and has the potential to change his behavior.
Pray for him. Ask your church prayer group to pray for him. Now is the time for you to increase your faith. Now is the time for you to get into the word. Now is the time for you to keep the word before you day and night, minute by minute, day by day. Being critical of him is not going to help. Loving him will help.
Read the Bible especially the New Testament. Your house is under attack by the devil. You must fight with the word to protect your children and to ask God to send his angels to help your husband.
This may just be a test for him to take him from a position of being lukewarm about his faith. And it definitely is a test for you to increase your faith, to know the power of God.